Internet Sensation (Vom Vorton)

hello, and thank you for reading my email
let’s not use the word spam
I caught word of your generosity
and I’m in a bit of a jam
I’m trying to offer an exclusive service
but funding has just fallen through
if you could contribute a little cash
I’d arrange a demo for you

it’s a direct connection
technology and brains
you can feel all human knowledge
running through your veins

push your face to the screen, feel the vibration!
sign up for an internet sensation
many thanks for your (most) welcome donation!
please hold for your internet sensation

hello, and thank you for completing our survey
sorry that you weren’t impressed
the reward is linked to the size of your gift
sorry if this rule was not expressed
I trust that we haven’t lost your faith
and we hope you’re not sore
the window is closing on this special deal
could you afford a little bit more?

[chorus x 2]

hello, we’re sorry to hear that you’re leaving
we’ll delete your account right away
perhaps our service did not suit your hardware
please try us again someday!