Well, that's adorable. You never said 1890s! I love subpar Bertolt Brecht pastiches and you nailed it.

It's possible to work with fake instruments and make it sound like a style unto itself. You yourself have done that in the past a lot. Unfortunately, I think this one misses the mark. I'm not sure what special sauce is missing that makes the fake instruments sound annoying instead of charming, but that's where we're at. I can hear a good song hiding under this mix and arrangement. I like the structure of the verse lyrics, with a clever turnaround in almost every line. I'd love to hear a bit of Cab Calloway style call-and-response on the "They've been" part. I'm imagining you singing "They've been!" and a chorus of baritones and basses repeating "They've been!" And then you sing "Dragging me around" and the backup singers come in a bar later with "Dragging him around," etc. That's one possible approach, anyway. As far as challenge goes, you set it up nicely, and I find it surprisingly satisfying to see how the creepy collector character from "Semiprecious" managed to break the cycle and have his moment of self-reflection. Your liner notes say that you've bridged the two entries "both lyrically and sonically," which is bizarre because that was the original suggested verbiage of the challenge before we shortened it. I 100% get how your lyrics bridge the previous two songs, but I confess that I'm not hearing how this connects those two musically. Not that it matters much to me, I'm happy to give you full credit for your take on the challenge. But the arrangement and mix is holding you back on this one.