Kick Start
Octothorpe
lyrics by SPUD

We're gonna make a movie,
And it's gonna go far.

If it's gonna be a big hit,
We've gotta find a star.

We've got a funny story,
and a really nifty script.

We've got a great director,
When he read it, he flipped.

CHORUS

We need a -uh- KICK START
to get it off the ground

We need a -uh - Mel Gibson
(Owen Wilson) (Johnny Depp)
to prove our idea's sound

We need a -uh- KICK START
before it gets too late

We need a -uh- Cameron Diaz
(Lisa Kudrow) (Tina Fey)
to slide it across the plate

END CHORUS

We need a sure winner.
A big box office draw

Who's not to expensive,
or in trouble with the law.

We'll give 'em a piece of the action
If they really insist,

So come on you guys,
Help me make a list.

INTERLUDE

Michael Douglas...Too Corporate
Gwyneth Paltrow...Too Skinny
Gerard Depardieu...Too French
Kevin Costner...Uh, Waterworld?
Doris Day...Too Old
Angelina Jolie...Too Scary
Hugh Grant...Too Sleazy
George Clooney...Too Expensive
Ralph Fiennes...Dead
Dennis Hopper...Give me the creeps
Elizabeth Taylor...You’re kidding, right?
Wesley Snipes...In Jail
Robert Downey Jr...Too Risky
Robert Redford...Too Retired
Jim Carrey...Too Gross
Woody Allen...Too Jewish
Eddie Murphy...Too Black
Richard Gere...Too Gay
Cameron Diaz ...Too Ditzy
John Malkovich...Yeah...John Malkovich

END INTERLUDE

REPEAT CHORUS

We're really on our way,
to big fortune and fame.

But for it all to happen,
We've got to get a name.

We've started shooting background
In our own backyard

But we need that special someone
can it really be that hard?

REPEAT CHORUS