In an alternative universe, this could be a Residents song. However in this universe, it's a hot MIDI mess and the weird timing issues with the phrasing (to these ears) means I can't overlook these problems. I think there is a good song in here but you haven't found out how to release it yet.

There are some aspects of the "Lichen Throat" that I'm pretty sure arise from limitations with how you make your tracks, but I've had to just embrace them as "What Lichen Throat sounds like." The eighth note guitar stabs sound unnatural, but you're not going for "natural," are you? It sounds messy, but I bet more people would be able to read it as a stylistic choice if you could get your vocals tighter. I can hear the melody you're going for on this one, but you spend most of the song drifting around that melody without landing on the right spot, and that keeps you out of consideration, unfortunately. I apprecaite how you split the difference between Carav-- er, I mean, "Frankie and the Mountweasels"'s deliberate mis-parsing of the title, and the actual meaning of "Semiprecious," contriving your narrative to fit both definitions. A good idea held back by struggling performance.

I don't think this is your best work, the lyrics are lacking that sharpness you often find in approaching your subject matter and the vocal delivery has a lot of timing issues, made worse by the fast pace of the song - it feels like you're always struggling to keep up. The arrangement is solid, and you wrote a song that addresses the title and the challenge so I don't think you deserved to rank last. But I've heard many LT songs that I enjoyed more than this one.