NUR EIN
almost 6 years agopassed
2:53
The Handbook
Max Bombast image
Max Bombast

Entry from The Handbook in Nur Ein XV.

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The Handbook
by Max Bombast

People ask "How do you do it Max?"
Listen close and I'll give you the facts
People ask "How do you do it Max?"
Well I'll tell you the truth
But it won't be much use
To you now

First thing that you gotta do is
Fire every single one of your muses
(Unless they happen to be me)
Next you delete all your music
God knows you're never gonna use it
So go and snap all your CDs

snap

Next step, hardest yet
This is the part where you play hard to get so just
Go pull that phone cord out the wall
Get rid of your instruments
That's the only way that you can not be tempted to
Break a string or break your heart

Oh these are the steps to take
If you wanna walk in my shoes
Oh these are all my mistakes
I made them
So can you!

People ask "How do you do it Max?"
Listen close and I'll give you the facts
People ask "How do you do it Max?"
Well I'll tell you the truth
But it won't be much use
To you now

Now wait a solid decade then
Look in the mirror and slap your face and
Go out and join a band
But next, and this part's essential,
Never play a show and start to go mental
So then you hatch up a plan

Build a room in your house
Where you can go to scream and shout and learn
Just what it takes to be a star
Buy back all of your instruments and then
Jump in and hit submit and go
Break a string or break some hearts

Oh these are the steps to take
If you wanna walk in my shoes
Oh these are all my mistakes
I made them
So can you!

People ask "How do you do it Max?"
Listen close and I'll give you the facts
People ask "How do you do it Max?"
Well I'll tell you the truth
But it won't be much use
To you now

Reviews

5 posted notes

vowlvom

Forum post

I never thought I'd be ranking an M. Bombast song this low but every part of this song seems designed to aggravate me. The vocal's full of pops that make it hard to listen to, the cymbals are aggressively tinny, the lyrics are a decent take on the challenge but the content is offputting and the music doesn't feel inspired enough to mitigate any of my problems with the rest of the song. I'm sure you'll still coast through the round and impress me with subsequent songs but this one really rubbed me up the wrong way.

glowworm

Forum post

great intro, hooked immediately. Half time section was dope, overall real catchy

owl

Forum post

I know your artist name is “Max Bombast,” but self-aggrandizing lyrics like this are a real turnoff, even if they’re intended to be tongue-in-cheek or ironic. However, this is a really catchy song, so I couldn’t help but like it despite the narcissism. I like the little stabs of high funky guitar. This is maybe overcompressed or something, I kept jumping when it came on right after Mandibles’ song, and I feel like every time you sing a “p” it’s a brief assault on my ears, particularly when you sing “people.” Nice harmonies, nice melodies.

bennyharv3

Forum post

I like the line you're sitting on. This could easily make you seem like a massive prick, but it's pretty silly so I don't get a huge sense of that. I do hear a ton of saliva and messiness in that vocal line, which is unusual for you, so I assume it's more of a production issue than anything else. Just watch your S's and hard consonants, either when recording or producing, please! I need to go clean my ears out now of any leftover water 🙂

Cybronica

Forum post

this has a good groove, but the self aggrandizing is a little much. Exquisitely mixed, and very well sung. The p’s sometimes pop a little more than id like them to, particularly at the start. “But next, and this part's essential,
Never play a show and start to go mental” is my favorite lyric. Such a great patter! This song is entertaining, but doesn’t have staying power for me.

Max Bombast - The Handbook | Nur Ein